Ask Allan
Men and Women


You specialise in relationship writing. Why do you think an increasing number of young people, mostly wealthy and urban, are choosing to stay single despite so many dating apps and relaxed social norms.


Our expectations of each other have become very critical.  For example, women today want from a man the things women have always wanted – a fit healthy body, ambition and the modern-day equivalents of his ability to provide food, shelter and protection.  But they now also want him to be soft, caring, understanding and to talk. Unfortunately, men who fit this description usually have a boyfriend.  Similarly, young men now believe that women no longer need to be romanced – you just ask for sex and the woman says ’yes’ or ‘no’. None of these approaches get the desired results and leave men looking like heartless individuals and women as demanding and confused. We will always need to have relationships with the opposite sex whether it be there father, brother, boyfriends, husbands, bosses or clients.  Our seminars are today witnessing a dramatic increase in people wanting our help to have better relationships with the opposite sex.  


Who is better at detecting a lie? A man or a woman?


As child bearers, women evolved with abilities in their brain to read the non-verbal signals of babies who don’t speak – is the baby hungry, frightened, tired, in pain and so on. Women also developed the ability to read the attitude of an approaching stranger – will they be friendly or aggressive? These were human survival skills that men did not need. Men needed to run, jump and accurately hit their target. As a result, women are far more capable at discovering lies than men are. This is why men are generally unsuccessful at lying to a woman face-to-face but women can lie to men with success. Men should never lie to a woman’s face – instead, phone her.


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